Joanna just started walking more regularly within the past few weeks and it has reminded me just how much I love this age. I love when babies began to act more like little people, begin showing their personalities, and copy the things they see other people do. It's neat to see the world through her eyes as she discovers it. Tonight I cooked dinner while the bigger kids napped and she hung around under my feet the whole time. I brought her little toy box into the kitchen so she could have something to do, but she just wanted to follow me around. Instead of getting frustrated that I was tripping over her, I kinda smiled inside thinking about how much this girl has grown over the past year and the kind of little person she is turning into.
Nathaniel is such ... a boy. Maybe it's the fact that I am a woman and I wasn't expecting such gender traits to be shown so early, but goodness, he is all boy. He loves to build, to fix things, to talk about all things cars and tractors, and he likes the idea of having a job. He wants to be just like his Daddy. He doesn't seem bothered when his face still has his dinner on it and he gets pure entertainment from talking about bodily functions. He likes to wrestle and likes to show his muscles. The teen girls at church love picking at him and deep down I think he secretly likes them, but he tells me, "I hate being cute." At the end of the day, though, that boy will curl up in my lap and tell me he loves his Mama. That's one of my favorite things in the world.
Constance, my heart, my first baby is growing up so quickly. When she lost her first tooth last week, I got emotional! Actually, I still get a little sad when she smiles and I see that gap from where the tooth was. I remember putting baby orajel on her little gums when she was a baby and anticipating that first tooth - well actually, the first two, as hers seemed to come in doubles. She is over halfway through with her first year of kindergarten and she is learning so much. She is also becoming very independent and doing many things for herself most days, being a big helper to me. She loves to pretend and play basically any kind of game she can think of. She also loves to draw and write her name. I can see the Lord working on her little heart and she learns little by little about the One who died for her and I know in time, she will understand her need for a Savior. She has a tender little heart and worries about everything, something I am afraid she inherited from me. However, although she is getting bigger, I still have my precious moments where she just wants to lay on me and be my only baby. It's hard for her to have to share everything with her siblings and she does a great job most days ... but sometimes she likes it to be just us. And I like to think back and remember how my life changed when I met her and how she has brought so much joy to our home and family.
Being a Mama can be challenging at times. I get frustrated at times and I might raise my voice or say things I really shouldn't say. I might get annoyed when the baby cries the second I crawl into bed and I have to get back up. Or when Nathaniel dumps every single toy he owns out of the toy box and doesn't play with them. But when I think about how blessed I am to have three beautiful, healthy, and sweet children ... it's worth it. It's worth getting to see them grow and develop into little people. It's worth it when I hear them singing "Victory in Jesus" or hear them say, "I love you Mama." There is nothing like it.