Josh and I discussed lastnight all of our plans for what to do once the baby is here. I have really stressed over many different things, trying to come up with a specific plan. I am the kind of person that has to have it all planned out and know how it's going to go, but I realize that it just doesn't work that way in situations like these. Constance is going to have her own way of doing things and we just have to follow with the guidance of doctors and others who've been there before. I know the best thing for us is to just take it in stride and learn as we go. It's too overwhelming to try and have it all figured out when you really can't even relate with the situation.
One thing I have let myself get too stressed about is breastfeeding. I've read so many books, blogs, and websites telling me I have to do this or that and I have been so overwhelmed. There seems to be so many different opinions and ideas on how it's supposed to go and what I am supposed to do. Yesterday I read that I should just keep the baby on my breast all day long for them to get used to it! (I'll love my baby, but I don't think I could handle that!!!) & With that I have put myself under immense pressure. Lastnight I got fed up with all of that and decided this is all just going to have to go as it will go. I've never breastfed before, I can't practice before she's here, and we'll just have to see how it goes. I am determined to give it a try and really work at it, because I know that breastmilk is ultimately the best option. But I also know that I am not a bad Mom if it doesn't work for us.
So, we came up with a little birth plan. I think a lot of birth plans are stupid, because a lot of women go as far to say what scent they want in the room, the lighting they want, or music they'd prefer to have playing. Yeah, I really don't care about any of that. I'm going to be at that hospital to do business. However, I did make a list of things that I would like Josh to firmly tell the nurses and staff at the hospital, so I can be reassured that things are going the way I'd like to. So really, this list is more of a hospital plan, because the majority of the things on it will take place after she's born. & It's for Josh, who I know has no problem being firm and making sure things go his way. :) (I know I'll be too flighty and off in another world to even attempt at being firm, which is something I stink at anyway.)
Obviously if things don't go as planned, like her being born early or having to go to the NICU, I understand these plans are subject to change. This is just in the ideal situation.
-I would like to have an epidural, as soon as possible.
-I would like for Constance to be cleaned off and whatever else is needed (Apgar score, bedside examination, etc.) before holding her.
-I would like for Josh to hold her first and then hand her to me.
-I would like to nurse her once I am holding her.
-I would like the option to decide whether or not she'll be rooming in with us or going to the nursery overnight. In the event that she does go to the nursery overnight, I would like the nurses to bring her to me and wake me up for feedings. This will be decided based on how we're feeling.
-In the nursery (or anywhere else), I do not want her to use pacifiers, bottles, or sugar water to stop her from crying.
-In the event that Josh feels I am too tired to wake up for a night feeding, I would like for him and a nurse to discuss the option of formula feeding through a cup or another alternative method. If bottles is the only option, try waking me up to see what I feel is best. At that point we will decide if I want to breastfeed or use a bottle to formula feed her.
-I would like to meet with a lactation consultant as soon as possible.
-I would like, if possible, for all of these things to be discussed with the nurses before Constance is born.
-If I have a c-section, with the exception of holding her after delivery and things like that, I still want everything to go according to plan. I would like to hold her as soon as I can and nurse her.
Today I called my former pediatrician to see if she's accepting new patients. & Thankfully, she is! The only catch is that I will have to take Constance to the Health Department for immunizations, but most people around here do that anyway. I am so thankful that I am able to see Dr. Doyle. I saw her starting my junior year all the way up until I went to college and she was absolutely wonderful. My mom was able to call her at any time with questions and concerns. One time, she even made a prescription for me without me coming into visit because it was the day before Thanksgiving, I was sick with strep throat, and I couldn't get in with an appointment! She was also very big on running tests and figuring out what was wrong with me while I was sick, while other doctors just kind of assume things and send you on your way. Doctors like that sound like a horror to me being a new mom and all! So, thankfully Constance will get to see Mommy's old doctor. & Because I have been so overwhelmed about what to expect as a parent and everything, this is a great relief! I want Constance to have the best.
So, I am trying to live easy about all of this new parent stuff. All of these books have all of this overwhelming information and while I do believe it is GREAT to be educated, you shouldn't obsess over it like I have. I have tried to shove it all in my brain and absorb it, but I've realized that is nearly impossible when you don't realize the majority of what it all means. We're going to take it one day at a time. Most importantly, we're going to give it to God who designed all of this parenting stuff and designed our bodies to do it. (None of these things are a surprise to Him!)