Well, my sweet Constance slept 5.5 hours straight lastnight! She then decided to fall asleep after every feeding this morning until about 9, which meant I woke up for the day when it was light outside. I feel like a new woman! I don't suppose she'll be sleeping long stretches like this a whole lot, but I'm glad it happens every once in a while. I really need it! :)
I hate how situations in life can get out of control. It starts as a simple disagreement or something of the sort, and the snowball effect occurs as it grows into something bigger. I don't believe there is anything wrong with disagreeing with people or having my own opinions. I don't believe there is anything wrong with anger. It would be foolish to try and go life without ever admitting how we really feel about things. However, if we're not careful, we can let something that simple turn into something much greater.
The Bible says, "Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil." Ephesians 4:26-27
It tells us to be angry, but not to sin as a result of that anger. To do that gives the devil a foothold in our lives, as we become resentful and bitter with those we're angry with. In my case, I get so furious over things that I'll tell anyone who will listen. These feelings also seep over into other relationships, as I find myself lashing out on the ones I love. You can hear it in the way I carry myself and in the way I speak. I get obsessed with it. As a result, my testimony as a Christian is ruined and the fellowship with God is broken because of sin.
"For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh." - Matthew 12:34
"He that handleth a matter wisely shall find good: and whoso trusteth in the LORD, happy is he." Proverbs 16:20
I should have taken my feelings to the Lord, who is the source of all wisdom in every situation. When I am angry, all rationality goes out the window and I act heavily on my emotions. To put it simply, I can't control my temper when it's actually been set off. However, I know I can avoid that if I just go to God with the problem. & Not just once - throwing it all on His lap expecting immediate relief and results. It takes persistence. 2 Corinthians says that Paul prayed about the thorn in his flesh thrice before he received an answer.
This answer being, "And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me." 2 Corinthians 12:9
He tells me ... I'm going to get you through this. Talk to Me about it.
That is what I plan to do. Prayer, reading God's Word, and more of it. I am still angry and hurt over things, but it's amazing how a heart softens by hearing the small and still voice of God. I am so sad over how things have changed and gotten out of control so quickly, but I have faith that God can heal. As always, it is best to walk in God's grace rather than stumble in my own obviously weak power.
There is never a situation in life where you can't use God's grace.